Childlike Trust

He called a child, whom he put among them, and said, “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever becomes humble like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

Matthew 18:2-4

Typically we hear this passage and think how nice of a sentiment it is and then we move on to being our adult selves who are in control, who are so wise and learned, and who can do all things. It is incredibly hard for us as adults to rely on someone else for help; we don’t want to be a burden or a drain on anyone. It is often easier to just figure things out on our own instead of reaching out to our friends and family when we are in need. 

Jesus teaches us the complete opposite in this passage. He says that we will not enter the kingdom of heaven without becoming like children. Children are completely dependent on their parents. From the time we are born, we can do nothing for ourselves. Only as we grow and mature do we begin to learn how to do things for ourselves, but we are still always limited in our abilities. I’d like to take a deeper dive into this teaching of Jesus on the importance of being childlike, so that we can soak in the healing truth that God is our good Father and we are His beloved children.

Dependence on God is what it means to be childlike. We were all children. When we were really young, we were completely dependent on our parents. We could do nothing without them. This dependency was what gave us a sense of security. When our needs were being met, it made us feel safe and cared for, but as we grew up we started to have desires as well as needs, and we began to confuse what we need with what we want. 

As we grew and matured, we also became more aware of the sinfulness of humanity and the evil in the world, which is how we learned to put limits on our trust and dependence on others. This is actually a good thing to learn that we cannot trust everyone in the same way, because there is evil in the world and we need to learn to protect ourselves. The danger in it is when it overreaches to include all people and even God; where we end up only being able to trust ourselves, not anyone else, not even God.

Learning how to protect and advocate for ourselves is such an important thing to learn. I recently had an experience where I was confronted with the reality that I had never really learned how to do this. I have always been so timid, which would result in my letting situations around me get worse and worse, leading me down treacherous paths, where I would eventually end up in a very dangerous situation. As I continued to go along these paths, there would always be red flags along the way, but I would just dismiss them, believing that nothing bad would ever happen to me. This I can now identify as being childish and immature. There is a very big difference between trusting in God’s providence and being presumptuous of His protection. In my timidity, what I was doing was presuming that I would be safe, instead of listening to the signs that were telling me to stop and guard myself from danger. When it became unsafe, I wouldn’t say anything, I wouldn’t stand up for what was right, and I wouldn’t say no. I can honestly say that only by the grace of God was I spared serious harm. 

Being childish is a distortion of the truth of being childlike. To be childish is to believe that you do not need to advocate for yourself. It is to live by a false humility that tells you to just be nice and accept everyone, to be tolerant of evil, which is immaturity and not love. Being childlike comes with an inner confidence that knows and believes in the goodness of God our Father. This holy confidence is where we experience enmity for Satan and all of the evil that he tries to encircle around us. It means standing up for ourselves and saying no to continuing down dark and dangerous paths because you and I are worth protecting.  When we are able to recognize evil and good in the world, we can then begin to equip ourselves with the tools to be able to avoid evil and stand for good. 

So while it is good to learn how to advocate for and protect ourselves from evil influences, it is also important to not let our distrust in evil influence our trust in God. There is a very delicate balance here that we must be keenly aware of. Our trust in God is based upon His perfect goodness. He is the source of perfect goodness and at the same time our Father. We are adopted into the family of God through our Baptism where we enter into this relationship with God; He as Father and we as his beloved sons and daughters. As Father, God is leading and guiding us, although we may not always know it or see it clearly. As children of God, we are to remain under His protection, rightly ordered as his beloved sons and daughters. Through sin, we move out from under the protection of God, so it is not God who fails at protecting us, but humanity who turns away from Him. Situations when we have been hurt or offended by others are precisely when the enemy comes in to convince us that God is not powerful enough to protect us or good enough to love us. This lie is a distortion that can do serious damage to our relationship with the Lord. 

When we accept what happens to us and make the best of it, we are praising God.

St Teresa of Avila

On the contrary, when we are firm in our relationship with God and we know and believe in His goodness, it shapes our entire perception. Childlike trust in God is key to our being able to live out our faith. When we are grounded in this full and total trust, all trials that come our way are no longer seen as roadblocks, but opportunities to grow in love. Whatever God allows is able to be redeemed. This is a bold truth that we could spend our entire lives meditating upon. When we place our trust in God, much like a young child who trusts his very life to his parents, we are placing ourselves in right order with God who is our all powerful and all knowing Father in heaven. As His humble children,  we must keep in mind that we need God in order to be saved.  

With this primary relationship with God in right order, we will then be able to learn how to have other healthy relationships. This is because our expectations for our other relationships will be appropriated based upon the truth of our relationship with God. We will understand that no other relationship will be as good or as perfect as our relationship with God, which we only experience in part in this life, but we hope to experience in its fullness in eternity. We will also be able to love others more fully because we will be receiving the love of God into our own hearts, transforming us more and more into his own image and likeness. This love of God received into our hearts is what teaches us who God is and who we are, which is always relational. If we do not know who God is, we cannot know ourselves. If we do not know ourselves, we cannot know God. 

Knowing God more fully is how we learn to trust Him. God is perfect Father because he is the creator and source of fatherhood. When we deepen and strengthen our relationship with our Heavenly Father, we will then learn how to depend upon Him. This is more than just something we come to understand, but it is a way of life. For most of us, to place our trust in God doesn’t mean retracting from the world so as to not be influenced by the world, but it means to live in the midst of it, just in a different way. Through detachment from earthly things, we are able to live in this world, yet fully attached to God. We can use the things of this world in a manner which is good and righteous, but we should not be attached to them, we should not make an idol out of them, and we should not abuse them in any way. To be dependent on God is to be like a child. We can fully surrender to God because of His perfect goodness. This is the reality we have been adopted into. It is our inheritance as beloved sons and daughters of God. 

Jesus teaches that in order to enter into the Kingdom of God, we must accept God in the same way that a child depends on his or her parents. Self sufficiency has plagued our country and while there is so much good in our learning how to take care of ourselves, it can also become a roadblock to our childlike trust in God. So many times in my own life I have pushed God aside so that I could get something accomplished in the way that I saw fit. I have left God in the dust and moved forward controlling and fixing things, instead of waiting on God and discerning what was His will. I can honestly say that in all these situations I have been humbled. Things didn’t turn out the way I had meticulously ochastrated, so I just convinced myself that my efforts were good enough. Only later in life have I learned that when I wait on God instead of reacting in haste, when I look to Him when I am in need instead of relying on myself, when I trust in His goodness instead of trying to make everything good on my own, then and only then am I able to witness the saving power of God. Only then does God reveal His true goodness to me. Only then am I able to see how a perfect Father loves His daughter.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

Proverbs 3:5-6